Business expert Andrea nierenberg has such a positive, uplifting attitude when it comes to business. I love to read her positive messages, and this article is no different!
In the Chinese scriptures it is written that a smile affects every single cell in our bodies.
We all know there has been much research conducted on how smiling and laughing can prevent some disease and certainly stress and that it take less muscles to smile then it does to frown---so why does it sometimes seem so hard to give one away.
I recently watched someone totally change when I said to him - ‘you have a great smile’---it was like he became a different person and he truly did. I took a chance because in our meeting, at first he epitomized a curmudgeon...
I took a leap of faith and I’m glad that I did in this case.
However sometimes we encounter people who we feel are difficult in the way they appear to us and we really shouldn't assume anything---knowing that for every action, there is always a reaction. It is human nature to make a judgment and we all do - so this is only a reminder on some basic suggestions.
Often when I present on conflict resolution in my communications sessions, I start with a basic truth that the only person we can truly change is ourselves. So the next time we run into someone who seems difficult or who doesn't seem to have an approachable expression, we might need to change the way we interact.
Take a quick look at my S.M.I.L.E. principle. I hope it brings one to your face after you review the list.
S. Stay in control. Think about how your responses could be perceived by others. See things from the other person’s point of view.
M. Make yourself be 'heard'. This has little to do with volume or emotion. It is about speaking clearly, and in a style others can appreciate. To understand the other--observe and listen to them, discover their hot buttons and don't push them.
I. Involve the other person by asking questions. Listen to the answers carefully. Then you can respond to their concerns and ask more questions that will address issues that interest you both.
L. Let go. Sometimes the best thing to do is to walk away. Sometimes you have to give the situation a rest. When you come back, you will see it from a different perspective.
E. Keep your ego in check and at the door. Your conscience needs to be your guide and maintain respect for the other person. The goal needs to be for both parties to win the war over the challenge, even if you have to surrender the battle.
It is always our choice. We can go through life fighting a battle or we can choose to sign peace agreements. Not always easy - yet the rewards are much greater with the latter.
Andrea Nierenberg is the president of The Nierenberg Group, a business communications company with a total process for educating, motivating and connecting people. Learn more at www.NierenbergGroup.com.
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