Use Humor to Open Hearts and Minds

Today communication expert Dianna Booher shares how you can successfully weave humor into your presentations. Actually enjoying a presentation sounds good to me!

In our presentation skills workshops, a frequent question our consultants receive is this: "When is it okay to use humor in a business or technical presentation?" Answer: Almost always.

The follow-up question: "How do you define humor? And where do you position the humor so that it works best?"

Humor, whether in a presentation or a conversation, doesn't necessarily mean a joke or one-liner. In fact, jokes rarely work. If you've already heard them, assume that others have as well. Having a sense of humor simply means the ability to see life in a light-hearted way. Those who see everything as a matter of life-and-death wear a permanent frown and make those around them ill at ease.

Personal anecdotes, humorous quotations, or witty comments overheard on the street, a cartoon quip, a visual, a prop, a facial expression or gesture added at the appropriate moment--these are the humorous touches that work best after you've established rapport with your colleagues.

Your willingness and ability to "lighten up" can be invaluable in positioning yourself as a confident person, comfortable in unscripted situations.

Author of 42 books, Dianna Booher, CSP, CPAE, delivers keynotes, breakout sessions, and training on communication and life-balance issues. Her latest books: Speak with Confidence, Your Signature Life, Your Signature Work, E-Writing, and Communicate with Confidence. www.Dianna-Booher.com

Present Proof, But Don't Expect It to Clinch the Deal

Communication expert Dianna Booher always shares presentation ideas that make a big impact on how you sell - and today's is no different!

Presenting proof makes a powerful presentation. But proof alone rarely makes a sale. Or sells an idea. Many people have wasted enormous amounts of time gathering proof only to discover that a prospect or a manager wouldn't agree that their data proved anything. Always agree on what the other party accepts as proof.

Next, confirm that the other party considers such proof meaningful. For example, you may prove that your engine is faster than any on the market, but if your client values low-cost maintenance more than speed, your proof will be "beside the point."

Then document your proof in writing so others can verify it. It's always advisable to capture your data and publish it in an article or white paper so that it passes the scrutiny of all concerned.

Finally, don't build your whole presentation around your proof, counting on it as "the sure thing." People buy for any number of reasons, and logical proof is only one of them.

Author of 42 books, Dianna Booher, CSP, CPAE, delivers keynotes, breakout sessions, and training on communication and life-balance issues. Her latest books: Speak with Confidence, Your Signature Life, Your Signature Work, E-Writing, and Communicate with Confidence. www.Dianna-Booher.com

Change Yes/No Issues to Multiple Choice

Communication expert Dianna Booher always gives great ideas for communicating with prospects in a way that is positive and productive. I especially like today's tip!

Don't make accepting or rejecting your idea an all-or-nothing proposition. If you agree that some action is better than no action, take care to help your listeners see other choices. If they can't purchase equipment now to do the printing, are they willing to let you contract with freelancers to get the work done? If they can't give you two operators for the week, can they contribute funds to help you pay for a temporary from outside? If management insists they can't affort to fly their people to the West Coast for a seminar, would they consider conducting a class locally?

Persuasion doesn't always result in a winner and a loser. When the possible answers change from yes and no, you just might come up with options that work for all sides.

Author of 42 books, Dianna Booher, CSP, CPAE, delivers keynotes, breakout sessions, and training on communication and life-balance issues. Her latest books: Speak with Confidence, Your Signature Life, Your Signature Work, E-Writing, and Communicate with Confidence. www.Dianna-Booher.com

Specifics - Or Just Semantics?

Communication expert Dianna Booher never fails to get me thinking with her communication tips newsletter. Today she discusses a common phrase and how it can lead to confusion in your sales process - very interesting!

How many times have you heard this comment interjected in a heated discussion: "Well, I think it's just a matter of semantics." Of course it is!

Words have meanings, and those meanings are not just a simple matter of semantics. Brushing them aside with, "I think we're really saying the same thing; it's just a matter of semantics," creates a dangerous intersection if people intend to arrive at agreement somewhere down the road.

Words carry a conversation. Selection is central to understanding and agreement. In fact, many customer complaints can be traced to this one root cause--vague words with a different meaning to the service agent and customer. The salesperson says, "We should be able to work out a substantial discount if you want to take the floor model." (The salesperson has in mind a 20 percent discount; the customer is thinking a 50 percent discount.)

Neither do we fare much better with different interpretations of internal communication. For example, the sales manager tells you that the company has had a significant increase in the number of leads generated by a new marketing campaign. What kind of increase comes to mind? 7? 70? 700?

When semantics enters the conversation, the conversation is no longer about semantics. Choose the precise word. Nail down the specifics.

Author of 42 books, Dianna Booher, CSP, CPAE, delivers keynotes, breakout sessions, and training on communication and life-balance issues. Her latest books: Speak with Confidence, Your Signature Life, Your Signature Work, E-Writing, and Communicate with Confidence. www.Dianna-Booher.com

You Don't Have to Answer Every Question

Today's selling point from communication expert Dianna Booher has an excellent point - you don't have to answer every question! If you're uncomfortable with a question, there are ways of deflecting it without stammering or turning beet red! Booher explains:

Growing up, we had to answer every question the classroom teacher asked, and that feeling of "must" still lingers. There are several ways you can deflect a question you don't want to answer, with or without giving a reason: "If I understand your question correctly, you're really asking if...," and give your own interpretation. "Your question prompts me to ask you something first. Is..." "I don't think that question has an answer." "The answer to that question would be purely speculative."

You can also use humor to deflect a question: "What a question! Do you want to get me fired?" (said with a light tone). "Don't we all wish we had the answer to that one...I'd settle even for half an answer." "You must have spent all night phrasing that question; give me a couple of weeks to come up with an answer, will you?"

If you're unsure whether the questioner has manipulative intentions, you can always ask the reason for the question or explain your reluctance in a straightforward way: "I'm curious. Why do you ask that question?" or "Under the circumstances, I don't think I want to answer that question" or "Such a question makes me a little uncomfortable. I'm not in a position to know all the related facts."

Sometimes not answering the question is the best response.

Author of 42 books, Dianna Booher, CSP, CPAE, delivers keynotes, breakout sessions, and training on communication and life-balance issues. Her latest books: Speak with Confidence, Your Signature Life, Your Signature Work, E-Writing, and Communicate with Confidence. www.Dianna-Booher.com

Know Your Audience and Adapt Accordingly

Communication expert Dianna Booher gives great advice you can use during your presentations and interactions with prospects and clients. Check out what she has to say about knowing your audience.

Know your audience and understand the value of adapting your message accordingly. Some people primarily take in information visually. Others pay attention to what they hear and rarely notice what they see. Still others learn and draw conclusions kinesthetically--primarily through what they experience with their own senses.

As individuals, people also vary along the continuum between the two extremes of directness--either very direct, bordering on the blunt, or indirect, expecting others to read their minds. Their words fall somewhere between a hint and a hammer.

In addition to individual styles, consider cultural uniqueness. In high-context cultures the message comes not only from the words, but the context of the words: Who said it? When? How? In response to what? What was not said? In other words, meanings are often implied and understood from many things other than words.

On consulting assignments, I’ve watched people walk into an executive boardroom to make a presentation, get an icy reception, and walk out with no idea why the group did not sign off on their project. The reason may have been a cocky attitude conveyed through their posture, a laid-back attitude that showed in their lack of preparation, their disrespect shown through dress, or their irritation piqued in response to questions.

As an effective communicator, your challenge is to understand that context--and adapt your style to that of the other person to achieve your purpose. Otherwise, your conversation will prove to be as fruitless as trying to play a tennis tournament with someone who refuses even to return the ball.

Author of 42 books, Dianna Booher, CSP, CPAE, delivers keynotes, breakout sessions, and training on communication and life-balance issues. Her latest books: Speak with Confidence, Your Signature Life, Your Signature Work, E-Writing, and Communicate with Confidence. www.Dianna-Booher.com

Ask Strategic Questions to Create Goals and Visions

Questioning is an important part of the sales process - but you'll get more out of your questions if you think strategically about which ones will get your customer thinking - and considering your business. Use these tips from communication expert Dianna Booher to start asking strategic questions, and start earning more sales!

Most of us are busy counting down the days and to-do's until Christmas and New Year's. We're also gearing up for the coming year--looking at what worked in 2010 and what we might try in 2011.

Whether you're reaching out to an inactive client, giving a year-end summary to your manager, or outlining next year's vision to your employees, asking specific questions can help your audience focus on the needs of the future and sometimes even expand their vision. What must be changed, improved, or solved?

Focus on strategic thinking with questions like these:

* "If we were able to off-load some of these routine tasks and could free your own marketing staff to devote their creative energy on the new product line, how do you think that could pay off for you in launching this new product line second quarter?"

* "Have you ever thought about automating your back-office processes?"

* "In what ways do you see us getting a competitive advantage if we change to a totally virtual staffing plan?"

Your questions should start the wheels spinning--big time. You just might uncover hidden possibilities or solve problems you didn't know existed.

Author of 42 books, Dianna Booher, CSP, CPAE, delivers keynotes, breakout sessions, and training on communication and life-balance issues. Her latest books: Speak with Confidence, Your Signature Life, Your Signature Work, E-Writing, and Communicate with Confidence. www.Dianna-Booher.com

Assume At Your Own Risk

Getting your point across clearly in meetings can sometimes be an art form - that's why I think this advice from communication expert Dianna Booher is so great.

People tend to walk away from a conversation, thinking they've made their point perfectly clear. Otherwise, they would have stated things differently.

Raise your virtual hand here: How many times have you walked out of a nonproductive meeting and heard other attendees mumble, "So what did we decide? Are we or are we not going to do X?" Only the subject changes.

Here are some other tell-tale signs related to the sin of assumption:

--Managers who look puzzled when their admin returns to them a spreadsheet representing a week's work when all they expected was a three-paragraph email
--Upset customers calling with "Where's my order?" when the service agent promised delivery "within a few days"
--Colleagues finger-pointing over project details that "fell through the cracks"

To make sure people walk away with the same message you intended to convey, verify by getting them to react to it in some fashion. These statements might be helpful to verify that they heard what you intended to communicate:

--"How do you think this policy will affect your staff?"
--"What objections do you think people in your area might have?"
--"What are some of the first steps you'd suggest to make this change reality?"
--"How easy (or hard) do you think this will be?"
--"What questions do you think we'll hear in the first 90 days as we roll out this program?"
--"Will delivery by June 15 work for you?"

Questions like these generate the comments that verify people really do understand your point. From there, you know whether to circle back with more elaboration or press on with your mission.

Author of 42 books, Dianna Booher, CSP, CPAE, delivers keynotes, breakout sessions, and training on communication and life-balance issues. Her latest books: Speak with Confidence, Your Signature Life, Your Signature Work, E-Writing, and Communicate with Confidence. www.Dianna-Booher.com

Make Sure Your Nonverbal Cues Don't Contradict Your Words

Dianna Booher is a communication expert who offers great advice for salespeople. After all, communication is a huge part of our sales - so make sure you follow her tips!

Have you ever been involved in a conversation that went something like this:

"Why did you get so upset at what I said?"

"Look, all I said, was 'blah, blah, blah.'"

"Yes, but what you meant was _______."

"All I said was, ‘blah, blah, blah.’"

"That's may have been what you said, but what you meant was ______."


This discussion could go on for days until someone understands that the message is what someone hears and sees, not necessarily what someone says.

Tell a non-performer that her behavior is unacceptable. But smile and nod encouragement at the wrong time during your discussion, and she may walk away thinking "no big deal" and go back to the status quo.

Announce to the media that the customer reports about defects in your product are isolated incidents. But do it with a furrowed brow and you may have lawyers soliciting class-action claims by noon.

Tell your team that "things are under control." But do it with a nervous fidget and team members may wonder if you'll hold your job long enough to report their recommendations.

Words alone never carry the complete message. Messages come from context, relationship, tone of voice, what was said, what was not said, and body language. Consistency produces clarity.

Author of 42 books, Dianna Booher, CSP, CPAE, delivers keynotes, breakout sessions, and training on communication and life-balance issues. Her latest books: Speak with Confidence, Your Signature Life, Your Signature Work, E-Writing, and Communicate with Confidence. www.Dianna-Booher.com

Use "Experience" as Your Edge in Influencing

Communication expert Dianna Booher knows how to turn your conversations into gold. Using different words or phrases in your speech can raise credibility, build rapport, and get you the sale! Today she shares her advice on using your experience to position yourself as an expert.

Others can argue about your facts, data, surveys, or research--and they often do! They can disagree that your product or services outshine the competition. They can doubt that your offering will resolve their problem. They can disagree that your ideas will correct a problem, meet a challenge, or take best advantage of a great opportunity.

But no one can dispute your experience. Your experience is yours alone. No one else has lived through it, observed its effects, and been shaped by it. When you state an opinion or respond to a question during a presentation “based on your experience,” state that experience with confidence.

For example, a buyer asks: “I think customizing the assessment is a waste of time. Why are you thinking we need a customized version added to our intranet before we roll this out to our own customers?” Your response: “That has to be your final decision, of course. It will delay the project by approximately two months. But in my experience in handling these projects for more than 70 clients during the last two years, I can recall only two clients who skipped that customization phase. And both regretted the decision because their own employees proved to be a great cross-section of the population to test user acceptance. I offer that experience for your consideration.”

Of course, others may try to discount your experience as “unrelated,” “irrelevant,” or “dated.” But as long as you show relevancy to the situation at hand, you’re the expert on your own experience.

Your experience can be accepted or rejected, but it’s still your experience--and irrefutable as such.

Author of 42 books, Dianna Booher, CSP, CPAE, delivers keynotes, breakout sessions, and training on communication and life-balance issues. Her latest books: Speak with Confidence, Your Signature Life, Your Signature Work, E-Writing, and Communicate with Confidence. www.Dianna-Booher.com

Recognize Resistance In All Its Forms

You may think you know when someone is interested or not - but communication expert Dianna Booher says resistance comes in many forms. See if you can recognize them!

Some people voice resistance openly: "I'm not interested." "I don't think the idea will fly." "I can't give it my full attention until next year." Others gesture their resistance: clock watching, foot or finger tapping, playing with objects within reach, doodling on paper, staring out the window or door. Others look for distractions to take them away: phone calls and fires to put out. Some try to make a game of it: They ask unrelated, distracting questions, nit-pick your data, and toss out silly comments. Some are openly rude and grow irritable. Some withhold key information and observations so you have to guess what they know. Others just sit patiently and wait for you to "get it over with" so they can politely say no.

Recognize all these signs of resistance so you know how far you are from agreement and can deal with their concerns early-while there's still time to resolve them and rally their support.

How? Engage the other person early. Make the interaction a dialogue, not a monologue. People believe their own data. They decide things for their reasons-not yours.

So what that means for you and me…is when trying to persuade, engage others in the conversation sooner rather than later.

Author of 42 books, Dianna Booher, CSP, CPAE, delivers keynotes, breakout sessions, and training on communication and life-balance issues. Her latest books: Speak with Confidence, Your Signature Life, Your Signature Work, E-Writing, and Communicate with Confidence. www.Dianna-Booher.com

The SalesDog blog will be quiet on Monday as we take time off to celebrate Memorial Day. We wish you all the very best - see you on Tuesday!

Influence, Don't Just Inform

Whether delivering a presentation to your CEO, writing a sales proposal, or soliciting a charitable donation from a celebrity, one of the biggest hindrances to success is being informative rather than persuasive. Information overwhelms us. If your listeners or readers want information, they can read tweets, blogs, online posts, or newspapers. They can hear TV and radio talk show hosts and guests spew information on every subject imaginable.

What can you bring to the table? Action. To influence, make the available information actionable for your audience. Use all five prongs of persuasion:

Word choice. Positive, specific, precise words. Nix the negative, vague words. Give people positive imperatives. Do X, Y, and Z for the results you want to see.

Rhetoric. Powerful phrasing and graceful grammar pack a powerful punch on a person's memory. Put in the time it takes to turn a memorable phrase. Presidential campaigns can be won or lost on the power of a slogan.

Emotion. People will argue all day that they don't make decisions based on emotion--but they do. Create feelings of pleasure, fear, safety, discomfort, pride, acceptance, rejection, or prestige, and clients and colleagues will act.

Logic. People must justify their emotional decisions with reason. So help them interpret the facts, information, and ideas available. Take a point of view. Lead others to draw conclusions. In other words, serve your entree instead of asking diners to walk through a buffet line.

Trustworthiness. Demonstrate your integrity. People need to trust your personal values and genuineness before they'll believe or do what you say.

Author of 42 books, Dianna Booher, CSP, CPAE, delivers keynotes, breakout sessions, and training on communication and life-balance issues. Her latest books: Speak with Confidence, Your Signature Life, Your Signature Work, E-Writing, and Communicate with Confidence. www.Dianna-Booher.com

Create Immediacy to Generate an Emotional Response

Make it personal, make it meaningful! This tip from communication expert Dianna Booher is great advice, not only for your business, but for every aspect of your life.

If you are a single adult reading a news story about a teenager killed on a motorcycle because he wasn't wearing a safety helmet, you may feel sorry, shake your head, and continue reading. However, if you just bought your 18-year-old a motorcycle and had an argument with him or her about the importance of wearing a safety helmet, you probably will tune in a little closer to the statistics to find out how you can convince your son or daughter to wear a helmet.

Bring your presentation issue as close to home as possible. Make your audience see, hear, touch, and feel the situation.

If the members of your management team hear about the low unemployment rate on the news, they will have a general awareness of the difficulty of retaining competent employees. However, if you cite the 38 percent increase in employee turnover at your Detroit plant, adding that the company's rehiring and retraining costs hit the half-million mark for the past year, these managers will quickly see the urgency of the employee-retention problem.

Whether you are talking about money, management, or marital problems, appeal to your listeners emotionally. Then supply the information to help them justify their decisions logically.

Author of 42 books, Dianna Booher, CSP, CPAE, delivers keynotes, breakout sessions, and training on communication and life-balance issues. Her latest books: Speak with Confidence, Your Signature Life, Your Signature Work, E-Writing, and Communicate with Confidence. www.Dianna-Booher.com

Decide That You WANT to Listen

I came across this article from sales and communication expert Dianne Booher, and it was so true I had to share it with you.

Booher says, "Many people listen poorly because they have no intention of listening well. They're preoccupied. They're too busy talking so that they can feel understood."

How many times have you sat in a meeting and watched a co-worker stare off into space or check their BlackBerry under the table? What about the person that cuts someone off mid-sentence to continue with their own agenda? You might not believe it, but these actions aren't kept just to the workplace - they extend to meetings with clients and prospects. Yikes! Read on for more of what Booher has to say on the topic.

"Have you ever heard people say that they don't have time for something: golf, a fundraiser, church, or dinner with a friend? What they mean is that something isn't important enough to them yet to make time for it," says Booher.

"The same is true for listening. We'll find ourselves poor listeners until we make up our minds we want to become good listeners. Listening requires conscious effort and a willing mind. It's a decision to take an action, not just waiting your turn to talk."

"Listening involves actively processing what the other person is saying to you: clarifying, asking questions, drawing out additional information, reading between the lines, giving feedback, verifying understanding, analyzing, and drawing conclusions about what you've heard," continues Booher.

"What's the payoff? Listening keeps you informed. It increases your impact when you do speak. It gives you a negotiating edge and powerful influence. Best of all, others will love you."

"Whether you're sitting around the conference table in a team meeting or the dining table for your Thanksgiving meal, make a conscious effort to listen. Listening is a gift you give to yourself and to others. Give it on purpose, not just when forced."

Author of 42 books, Dianna Booher, CSP, CPAE, delivers keynotes, breakout sessions, and training on communication and life-balance issues. Her latest books: Speak with Confidence, Your Signature Life, Your Signature Work, E-Writing, and Communicate with Confidence. www.Dianna-Booher.com

The SalesDog blog will be quiet the next two days as we take time off to celebrate the Thanksgiving holiday with our families. We wish you all the very best - see you on Monday!

Don't "Over Respond"

When I'm nervous, I tend to babble. It's definitely something I've been working on, and this advice from communications expert Dianna Booher is a great reminder for me slow down and shut my mouth!

Keep Answers to Complex Questions Clear Yet Simple

"Answer a question clearly and succinctly and then stop," says Booher. "Continuing to ramble on about a complex matter can make the issue seem even more complicated and can cause the other person to give up in frustration."

"Give an overview of the "must know" information, then wait to see if the other person asks for further details. If so, you can always add a second layer of detail to the foundational information you have already provided. Let follow-up questions be the guide as to how much or how little detail is appropriate."

"With an over-response to questions, you may find that your discussion gets sidetracked on unimportant issues, and then you're forced to rush through key points to finish within the allotted meeting time," explains Booher.

Shoot for the simple and hit the mark every time.

Author of 42 books, Dianna Booher, CSP, CPAE, delivers keynotes, breakout sessions, and training on communication and life-balance issues. Her latest books: Speak with Confidence, Your Signature Life, Your Signature Work, E-Writing, and Communicate with Confidence. www.Dianna-Booher.com

Language Can Shape the Outcome of a Negotiation

When people hear the word "negotiate" they often think of haggling or arguing over price - they don't necessarily think "win-win situation." Yet, according to communication expert Dianna Booher, that's exactly what negotiation can be.

"Only recently have negotiators embraced the idea that all parties can walk away winners," says Booher. "And language plays a big part in setting the tone, shaping how people think and feel about working together, and dictating the final outcome."

Consider these tips from Booher for a "win-win negotiation":

Substitute "we" for "you and me"
Let language imply your intention to work out an agreement to everyone's advantage. Examples: "What would we have to do to get X to happen?" "How can we design this schedule so you don't have to work overtime and so we can meet the customer's deadline?" "What can we work out so that I don't have a large cash outlay upfront, and you still feel that you're not walking into a high-risk situation?"

Start with goals, then move to solutions
If you start with solutions to a problem and one or both of you can't accept the stated solutions, you may remain at odds forever. If, on the other hand, you state only your goals or motivations, then you can either accept or reject solutions as necessary and still come to an agreement that allows both of you to meet your goals.

Dianna Booher is the founder of Booher Consultants, a global performance improvement firm that works with organizations to increase profitability and market share through more effective communication - oral, written, and interpersonal. Learn more at http://www.booherconsultants.com

Unstuck the Staller

You know the type - they hem and haw through all your follow-up phone calls and just can't seem to make a decision. Phone call after phone call, meeting after meeting, and you're no closer to a deal. What can you do to get them to take action? Try this advice from author and speaker Dianna Booher:

Offer guarantees

"Stallers typically suffer from indecisiveness," explains Booher. "Create opportunities for the indecisive to touch, see, feel, and experience your product or service. Provide all the possible evidence of results. Put the indecisive in touch with references who can offer assurances. Delay payment options until the buyer has opportunity to sample your service and trust that you will not deliver and then run and hide."

Help the indecisive to pass the buck

"Once you determine your Staller is incapable of making a decision no matter what guarantees you offer, help him to pass the decision off to others, for example, his boss, a team of colleagues such as a task force, or even a subordinate 'who needs to develop judgment.' If the would-be target is a task force, volunteer to help get the group organized. Yes, generally, it is tougher to sell to a committee, but you have a better chance of selling to an action-oriented committee than a stalled individual," says Booher.

You probably have a few Stallers clogging up your pipeline right now. So, get in gear and put this advice to work for you right away.

-- Dianna Booher, founder of Booher Consultants, is a contributor to Top Dog Sales Secrets. She delivers keynotes and training on business communication.